Habits: Building What Helps You & Breaking What Holds You Back
- Wilbert Frank Chaniwa
- Nov 16
- 5 min read
A Biblical, Psychological, and Practical Reflection Inspired by Atomic Habits
Habits are the invisible architecture of our lives. They shape our attitudes, influence our decisions, and slowly sculpt the person we become. James Clear, in his bestselling book Atomic Habits, explains that habits are “the compound interest of self-improvement.” Spiritually, the Bible affirms that consistent small actions shape character: “Whoever is faithful in little will be faithful in much” (Luke 16:10).
Whether in marriage, spiritual life, relationships, career, or health, your habits either build your future or sabotage it. This article explores how to form good habits and break destructive ones—combining insights from psychology, Scripture, and practical wisdom.
1. The Power of Habits: Why They Matter
Psychologically, habits form because the brain seeks efficiency. Repetition turns actions into automatic routines stored in the basal ganglia. Spiritually, Scripture teaches that repeated actions shape the heart:
“For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he.” — Proverbs 23:7
Your habits determine your:
Behavior
Mindset
Emotional responses
Relationships
Spiritual growth
Health
Career progression
Good habits bring order, discipline, and blessing. Bad habits create chaos, stagnation, and spiritual drift.
2. Building Good Habits — Lessons from Atomic Habits & Scripture
James Clear outlines four laws for building good habits. These principles mirror biblical wisdom.
A. Make It Obvious — Clarity and Intentionality
Good habits must be visible and structured.
Psychology:
The environment influences behavior more than motivation.
Bible:
Habakkuk 2:2 — “Write the vision and make it plain.”
Application:
Plan prayer time by placing your Bible where you see it.
Put a reminder on your phone for a daily “check-in” with your spouse.
Keep healthy snacks visible and sugary snacks hidden.
Put your goals where you will see them daily.
B. Make It Attractive — Enjoy the Reward
We repeat what feels rewarding.
Psychology:
Dopamine increases motivation.
Bible:
Psalm 34:8 — “Taste and see that the Lord is good.”
God encourages obedience through blessing.
Application:
Pair morning devotion with something you enjoy (coffee, worship music).
Reward consistency in workouts with something healthy but enjoyable.
Make date nights enjoyable, not a chore.
Create a pleasant work environment to boost productivity.
C. Make It Easy — Reduce Friction
Small steps produce big change.
Psychology:
The brain prefers the path of least resistance.
Bible:
Zechariah 4:10 — “Do not despise small beginnings.”
Application:
Start praying for 3 minutes daily, then gradually grow.
Begin exercising for 10 minutes instead of overwhelming yourself.
Have short daily check-ins with your spouse before attempting long conversations.
Break big goals into small, manageable actions.
D. Make It Satisfying — Celebrate Progress
Celebration reinforces the behavior.
Psychology:
Immediate rewards strengthen habit loops.
Bible:
Ecclesiastes 3:13 — God desires His people to enjoy the fruit of their work.
Application:
Track your spiritual or marital habits using a habit tracker.
Celebrate small fitness milestones.
Reward yourself when you complete weekly goals.
Celebrate consistency in reading, prayer, or communication.
3. Breaking Bad Habits — Reversing the Four Laws
Every bad habit can be broken by applying the opposite of the habit laws.
A. Make It Invisible
Remove triggers.
Examples:
Block distractions on your phone during work or devotion.
Remove access to toxic people or environments.
Hide or eliminate unhealthy foods.
Reduce exposure to temptations like pornography or gossip.
Bible:
2 Timothy 2:22 — “Flee from youthful lusts.”
Some habits are broken by removing proximity.
B. Make It Unattractive
See bad habits for what they really are—destructive patterns.
Strategy:
Reflect on consequences of anger, laziness, overspending, overeating.
Create “Pain Associations” (What does this habit cost my marriage? My health? My spiritual life?)
Bible:
Romans 12:9 — “Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.”
C. Make It Difficult
Increase friction to reduce temptation.
Examples:
Put locks or passwords on apps that waste time.
Put unhealthy foods where they are hard to reach.
Delay impulse purchases.
Create accountability structures.
Bible:
Matthew 26:41 — “Watch and pray so that you do not fall into temptation.”
D. Make It Unrewarding
Remove the satisfaction that comes with the bad habit.
Examples:
Ask accountability partners to check in.
Track how the habit harms your progress.
Replace it with a positive routine.
Bible:
Galatians 5:16 — “Walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh.”
4. HABITS IN KEY AREAS OF LIFE
A. Marriage Habits
Your marriage is shaped daily, not yearly.
Good Marriage Habits
Daily affectionate touch
Speaking life, not criticism (Proverbs 18:21)
Prayer together
Weekly date nights
Checking in emotionally
Showing appreciation
Bad Marriage Habits to Break
Silent treatment
Phone addiction
Avoidance of communication
Harsh words
Unresolved conflict
Neglecting intimacy
Atomic Habit Principle:
Small consistent actions build trust, connection, and intimacy over time.
B. Spiritual Life Habits
Spiritual growth is daily devotion, not occasional inspiration.
Good Spiritual Habits:
Daily reading and reflection
Consistent prayer
Fasting rhythm
Sunday fellowship
Serving others
Scripture meditation
Bad Spiritual Habits to Break:
Spiritual inconsistency
Neglect of church community
Prayerlessness
Compromise with small sins
Relying on emotions over discipline
Bible: Psalm 1 shows that the blessed man has consistent spiritual habits.
C. Relationships & Family Habits
Healthy relationships thrive on positive patterns.
Good Habits:
Kindness
Checking in
Gratitude
Apologizing quickly
Creating family routines
Honoring one another
Bad Habits:
Criticism
Bottling emotions
Avoidance
Gossip
Reactivity instead of responding
Psychology:
Habits of communication shape relational safety.
D. Career Habits
Your professional life reflects your discipline behind the scenes.
Good Career Habits:
Punctuality
Time-blocking
Skill development
Networking
Focused work
Setting weekly goals
Bad Habits:
Procrastination
Disorganization
Overcommitment
Poor boundaries
Lack of clarity
Bible:
Proverbs 22:29 — diligence leads to elevation.
E. Health Habits
Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19).
Good Health Habits:
Regular exercise
Proper sleep
Healthy eating
Stress management
Hydration
Routine medical checkups
Bad Health Habits:
Overeating
Sedentary lifestyle
Stress eating
Neglecting rest
Poor lifestyle boundaries
Psychology:
Physical health boosts emotional, mental, and spiritual stability.
5. How to Stay Consistent — Biblical & Psychological Strategies
Identity First: “Who do I want to become?”
Atomic Habits teaches identity-based habits.
Bible teaches transformation begins in the heart (Romans 12:2).
Environment Design:
Create surroundings that make obedience and discipline easier.
Habit Stacking:
Attach new habits to existing routines (e.g., pray after brushing your teeth).
Accountability:
Ecclesiastes 4:9–10 — two are better than one.
Grace, Not Perfection:
Progress, not perfection, is God’s path (Philippians 1:6).
Your Future Is Hidden in Your Daily Habits
Every habit is a seed.
Good habits plant a fruitful life.
Bad habits sow destruction.
Marriage thrives on daily love.
Spiritual life grows through daily devotion.
Health strengthens through daily discipline.
Career advances through daily diligence.
Relationships deepen through daily investment.
Your habits determine your direction, and your direction determines your destiny.
Choose wisely.
Will & Efe Chaniwa
Co Founders - Come Broken
Rooted in Christ Ministries
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