How Modern Couples Are Removing God from the Process of Marriage

Marriage, once revered as a divine covenant, is increasingly being treated as a social contract or emotional arrangement. In modern times, many couples have chosen to exclude God from the process entirely—both in preparation and in practice. The result is a rise in broken relationships, disillusionment, and emotional disconnects that echo a deeper spiritual crisis.

As the Bible says, “Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain” (Psalm 127:1). Without God at the center, marriage loses its eternal foundation and becomes vulnerable to the pressures of self, culture, and circumstance.

1. Causes: Why God Is Being Removed from Marriage

There are several cultural and psychological reasons behind this shift:

a) Rise of Secular Individualism

Modern culture teaches people to “follow your heart” and “do what makes you happy.” This self-centered narrative replaces God’s design of sacrificial love with personal gratification.

b) Distrust in Religious Institutions

Scandals, hypocrisy, and poor representation within some religious circles have caused many to associate faith with control rather than freedom, leading couples to separate their romantic lives from their spiritual beliefs.

c) Influence of Media and Pop Culture

Movies and social media often glorify passion without commitment and freedom without responsibility. This redefines marriage as something optional or temporary rather than a lifelong covenant.

d) Lack of Biblical Foundation Before Marriage

Many couples enter marriage without understanding the spiritual and covenantal nature of it. They rely on emotion and attraction instead of God’s principles, making their relationship unstable from the start.

2. Effects: The Cost of Removing God

When God is removed from the foundation of marriage, the consequences ripple across families and generations.

a) Weak Covenant Understanding

Without seeing marriage as a sacred covenant, couples are quick to give up when challenges arise. The idea of “forever” becomes negotiable.

b) Increased Divorce and Infidelity Rates

When self is at the center, commitment fades during hardship. Love becomes conditional—based on performance rather than faithfulness.

c) Emotional and Spiritual Disconnection

Without prayer, shared faith, and biblical values, couples lose spiritual intimacy. The relationship becomes purely physical or transactional.

d) Generational Breakdown

Children raised in homes where God is absent often grow up without a strong moral compass, continuing the same cycle of spiritual neglect in their own relationships.

3. What Can Be Done to Fix This Epidemic

To restore God’s place in marriage, couples, churches, and communities must be intentional about returning to the biblical blueprint for love and commitment.

a) Rediscover the Biblical Blueprint for Marriage

God designed marriage as a reflection of Christ’s relationship with the Church (Ephesians 5:25–33). Husbands are called to love sacrificially, and wives to respect and support in unity. Returning to this design brings order and peace back into the relationship.

b) Pray Together Regularly

Couples who pray together invite God’s presence into their union. Prayer softens hearts, heals emotional wounds, and unites couples under a shared spiritual vision.

“For where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.” — Matthew 18:20

c) Seek Godly Counselling Before and During Marriage

Premarital and marital counselling rooted in Scripture helps couples understand God’s expectations and deal with issues early. A wise counsellor brings biblical truth to areas where confusion or pride might take root.

“Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.” — Proverbs 15:22

d) Build Your Relationship on the Word, Not the World

The Word of God must be the foundation—not culture, not emotions, not social media trends. Couples should read Scripture together, attend church, and surround themselves with a community that upholds biblical marriage values.

e) Repent and Realign

If you realize that you’ve left God out of your marriage, it’s never too late to invite Him back in. Repentance opens the door for healing and restoration. God specializes in rebuilding what was broken.

“Return to me, and I will return to you,” says the Lord Almighty. — Malachi 3:7

The epidemic of godless marriages is not just a social issue—it’s a spiritual one. When couples remove God from the equation, they remove the very glue that holds love, patience, forgiveness, and purpose together.

But the hope of restoration is still alive. By returning to God’s Word, seeking His wisdom, and walking in unity through faith, couples can build marriages that not only survive but thrive—reflecting the love of Christ to a broken world.

At Come Broken we are praying for marriages amd families to put God in front and in the middle of the marriage and family. This we believe is the ONLY way to have a lifelong satisfying marriage.

“Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” — Mark 10:9